Sometimes my mind races and I think of the future. Sometimes, I am scared of the future, and then sometimes I am excited. High school is the last year of free education. After highschool, your into university/college. It'll be your first big step into true freedom. WHen I was younger, I always dreamed of highschool. The independence. Everything. But now, I want to take a step back. I feel as if everything is going too fast. I'm scared. But, no matter what, time keeps moving. I still want to be a famous actress. That hasn't changed. But I'm looking at when can I grab the opportunity. I was thinking of doing it when I was 16 to start and gradually working from there. I think I have a bit of it planned out. But I'm scared of my mom and dad's reaction. I know my dad wants me to work in the medical fields and honestly if I pursue this, I can't fuck up. I mean if I still love acting, which I'm pretty sure I will, I would want the fame to keep building, but if it's going at a slower pace I'll make sure I major in something medical. WHen I close my eyes, the first thing that makes me happy is acting, not the sound of heart monitors beeping. It makes me nauseous. I want to guided, and I know only the greater force will lead me to my path. If God wants me to be a famous actress, he'll mark the way there. If he doesn't it means he wants me to path out the way myself, and if that doesn't work choose an alternate route. I pray to God, God wants me to be an actress. "If things fail, try, try, again."